Thursday morning. It actually always starts a day, two days and a week before, and ends a few days after. Inside, inside me. The excitement for the meeting. the fear Even the pain is already starting to be felt. And also expectation, and desire, curiosity and an expanding heart.
I go out to meet my neighbors, again. Those neighbors that, until a little while ago, I could not see. I could not. I didn't know how. And here, a door opened for me, a window opened and I can see eyes, hug and kiss cheeks. laugh together And also to cry.
My dear neighbor, how happy I was to see you again, two weeks later. How good it was to see your face. How much love you sent towards me with your smile. It almost destroyed me. I came to you with the binoculars, as I promised. light up your eyes We went out barefoot to the open landscape towards my house. I showed you where my house is, on top of the hill. This is my house. Tomorrow at eight in the morning, we go out with the binoculars to wave goodbye, good morning. We agreed and laughed out loud. We went back to the women's room, you had a grandson. You asked me how my children are? what a smile how much love. I was overwhelmed. The children draw on the floor with Malia, cut happily, and I watch, listen. And we have to go, to the next visit. With a combination of relief and sorrow we part. You hug and kiss me warmly and whisper in my ear - I love you. I was out of breath. I love you! I laughed and said to you. Love filled and washed me.
We moved to another village, new to me.
Once again a woman's face lights up to me, welcoming me, with a beautiful wrinkled smile. A smile that doesn't know my face yet. And here we meet for the first time. shyly and curiously. We sat in the room, grandmother on the bed, sick. Eyal approaches to treat, giving acupuncture, massage. And we sit in a circle around. Eyal tells you that I am a neighbor. Um al Arais you say. "Mother of the weddings" This is how you call my settlement, because they say that in the days of the Turks there was one night when seven weddings took place at the same time on this mountain and seven bonfires were lit. With a smile on your face you asked Eyal in Arabic that I didn't understand - so why are you blocking my way? I was stabbed in the heart. I was ashamed. I was in no rush to answer or respond. I came to get to know and meet, and this is what comes up. I kept quiet a little and replied - I'm sorry.
Simply, afraid. We don't know the people who pass by our settlement, so we are afraid. So close the road. All from so much fear. You smiled at me and nodded in understanding and helplessness. And I was silent. I was suddenly overwhelmed. I joined Malia on the floor with the children and the paintings. I drew to my self and tears started falling from my eyes. The humility and nobility flooded me with tears. With what a smile she welcomes me, serves me pita bread and olives, what warmth radiates from her eyes. My god, the fact that until a few minutes ago she was the offensive, harmful and scary settler blocking her driveway to the house. And in one moment, or several moments, her gaze was changed to me. Because our eyes met. And we met. What humility to change the look and understanding like this, contrary to everything we learn and know from the dawn of our childhood, in a moment of encounter. In front of the existence that exists now and not thoughts and assumptions.
Thank you for every open heart, there in the space.
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